Not sure what to do
Hello! I’m 37 and I’ve had one C-section, one miscarriag, and one still birth. And several weeks after the still birth I hemmoraged and almost died. My period still gives me anxiety because of that and I really wanted to try a menstural cup, I think it could really be a good thing for me. I tried a diva cup size 2. I’m having a little trouble getting it to open up, but while I am wearing it, it is wonderful, I barely even realize it is there! But when I try to take it out I’m having issues. I start taking it out and I slide my finger up to break the seal and start pulling it out but when I get it almost out I have horrible pain, to the point that I after using it a few time I can’t stand to use it anymore. The Dr has always told me that I am small, and I had to have the C-section for that reason. I don’t know if I am taking it out wrong, or if it is too big, or if I’m just too sensitive. I haven’t been able to use tampons since the C-section becausee they are uncomfortable. I’m pretty sure I have a medium cervix, I did have some cramping because I think the diva is too long. Do you have any advice on what cup would be best? Thanks.
What you’re describing to me sounds like the cup rim is brushing, pushing, hitting, your urethra on the way out. This can cause burning, sharp pains, cramping, and/or some other issues.
If this is what you’re experiencing, you can try two things:
- Insert your thumb when the base of the cup is at the opening to your vagina. Using your thumb press down on the cup (nearest to your bladder) and hold it partially collapsed until you remove it completely. This will ease the pressure of the rim or your thumb will completely guard it.
- Try a softer cup. Although the Diva Cup isn’t a very firm cup, the rim can feel too firm for some people.
Many of us have experienced the same thing but have found ways to use a very firm cup without problems.
I used to work in an OB-GYN. He was also the doctor that delivered one of my children when I was 15. I had my second child years later delivered by another doctor, in another state. Both doctors said I was “small”. Both doctors opted for a scheduled c-sec to avoid complications.
What they’re referring to is a small (narrow) pelvis which can make child delivery hard on both mother and child and can ultimately result ending in an emergency c-sec.
This really shouldn’t keep you from using a cup as even the largest cup is going to be WAY smaller than an infant. Most are about the same diameter as an “average” penis.
If you meant that your vaginal opening feels “tight”, then it may take some practice, personal lubricant, and/or touch therapy.
The tissues in the area expand to accommodate a wide range of shapes and sizes. From toys, penis, babies, etc. However, some may have anxieties or a case of Vaginismus (aka Vaginism).
As for the Diva Cup feeling too long, if you already trimmed the stem, you can try turning the cup inside out if you’re comfortable removing it without one. This will shorten the cup a bit to see if it feels more comfortable. If it does, it’s perfectly safe to use it this way. If you’d rather find something else, there are many cups that are shorter than the Diva Cup.
On a side note, many people find that the Diva Cup is too long even using the smaller size since both sizes are the same length. The diameter is just slightly more narrow on the small.
If these suggestions don’t work for you or you’d rather buy a completely new cup, I’d be happy to narrow down a few cups that might be more comfortable.